I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Dignity is for republicans.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
