singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize