covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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