dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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