I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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