I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
