For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
my liver is dry heaving
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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