okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
