If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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