I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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