after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
