She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
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