Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
