yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
