At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
