I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
