another moral hangover. fuck.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I smell like Dick and happiness
If I had your ass I would rule the world
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize