Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Randomize
