It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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