Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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