Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I didn't shave. On purpose
Someone shit on the floor
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
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