dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Randomize
