Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize