so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i drank out of a bidet.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
