No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
