dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
