She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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