I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
