Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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