She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
