Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Text me some of your sweat
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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