I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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