Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
