do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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