Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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