Its about making memories worth repressing
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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