just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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