Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
