just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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