Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
