i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
