i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
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