I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
