we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
