I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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