I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
