Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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