Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
