There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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