Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize