You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
