What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
